...you'd be "Wee Angel, Shreiking Eel"
Right now, you're a wee angel, asleep in my arms, after a meal straght from "the tap" as it were. you were still hungry, so momma finished it off with a dessert from the bottle, but you are making great progress.
we've been doing a big no-no and are letting you sleep in our bed, between our pillows. the fear is that we'll accidentally roll over onto you. so far, you and i have gotten awfully cozy, but no limbs have snapped yet, so that's good. mom claims there are these "bumper" things available to keep you isolated from us. i'm picturing a rectangle of "funoodles," but it's probably more than that. we'll see about getting you a bumper set to protect your wee angel limbs.
...and, as if to demonstrate the point, you have just become shreiking eel... gotta go. i love you!